TAG | Business Week
I thought about capitalizing HILARIOUS for the title of this post. I’ll get to that part in a second.
So, Outsports recently posted a link to a story in Bloomberg titled, “Gay Sports Bars Proliferate as Growth in Disposable Income Fuels Profits.” I read it for my own curiosity’s sake and to see if the Columbus gay sports bar Score got a mention. But at that time, I did not feel it was particularly newsworthy, so I decided to not share it.
Then, a friend also showed me that the news to me as well. I decided that if someone else was interested, then there are probably others and I should pass along the link at least. I’d normally just post it on the Wide Rights Facebook page (I recently added a plug-in to the right of this page that shows that feed) with a line of commentary and call it a day.
The spoof article TWO forwarded is by ‘Christ Wire’ titled, “Sweat, Sodomy and Radical Socialism: A Shocking Look Inside America’s Most Dangerous Gay Bars.” It’s an article with the typical over sensationalized, completely slanted views into gay culture that we often see from actual Christian organizations. It’s comedy gold!
The entire article is extremely hilarious, and it is especially laughable for a couple reasons (and maybe these are only funny to me):
(1) The descriptions of the types of bars at the end of the article.
It titles the section, “An Encyclopedia of Homosexual Drinking Establishments,” in an attempt to sound official. Since we’re on the subject of the trend of gay sports bars, I have to share their definition:
“Sports Bars: A famously dangerous place for the confused heterosexual, these businesses lure unsuspecting sports fans inside with wide-screen televisions and expensive cable channels. Upon closer inspection, one will notice that the patrons here are spending more time examining the tight buttocks of star players than the actual games themselves. Beware the friendly jock who invites you to reenact the high school drama of locker room horseplay (in his mother’s basement).”
I try to not throw in LOLs into my writing, but I actually do laugh out loud when I read that.
Some other definitions include Business Men’s Clubs, Piano Bars, and Twinkie Bars. Oh, and the racism in the Latino Bar definition is probably more offensive than all the other gay innuendo. Read: “The Latino Bar: With all the glamour of an INS processing center, the Latino bar is shockingly direct about its purpose on American soil. Sex, sex and maybe a green card.”
(2) The Google ads linking to gay dating websites.
I hope some unsuspecting Christians stumble upon the site and then start exploring the Google ads. :)
P.S. Yes, the site was so good (and I didn’t browse around looking closely enough and probably have a bias to look for over-sensationalized Christian rhetoric) to realize it actually wasn’t a real Christian site at first glance.